• Valerie


© photo Marie Ruwet

“Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage and confidence in the doing” – Theodore Roosevelt.

It’s very important to face our fears, not to dismiss them. Your emotions need to be expressed and acknowledged, but once you’ve done it, decide to do something to not let fear have you. For example, when you experience fear, say “I’m afraid for my health. And now this is what I could do to change that”.

Learn to befriend your fear but do not let it control your life. You are on the driver’s seat and you have the power to control your life. You are not your fear! You have negative emotions but it’s up to YOU to decide what you want to do with them.

Don’t let fear define you. You always have a choice about how you’re going to act! Do you prefer to let fear drain your energy or to replace it by more empowering feelings and thoughts? Do you prefer to stay stuck in your fear or to move forward? You can feed your mind the same way as you feed your body. Do you intend to nurture your body or to fill it with junk food? The same goes with your emotions. What you do with fear is up to you.

Our problem is the judgement of our emotion. It’s totally ok and human to feel fear, so demonizing the emotion is important. We can breathe in the fear, acknowledge it, be with it and then challenge it into something purposeful. We can learn to develop a positive relationship with our fear.

We can show gratitude in the current situation and in our fear, even though we don’t see the benefits yet. Because once we experience a new kind of pain, we get to discover ourselves better and we get to serve in a more powerful way, with a new understanding and a new experience.

Most of the time, we can’t see the light in a different way, unless we’ve been in the dark. We are all facing a dark period right now, so let’s make light out of this!

Neuroscience has validated that labeling and recognizing our emotions reduces the activity in the emotional part of our brain and increases the activity in the prefrontal cortex, which helps people set and achieve goals. So if we allow ourselves to pause, to notice the fear, to ask ourselves “What am I feeling right now?”, we stop resisting it.

When we surrender to it, it no longer controls us.

Stop judging the situation by saying “this is right or this is wrong”, “this is good or this is bad”, “this person should do this or shouldn’t do that”, “I am weak or I am strong”. There is no such thing as being right or wrong, because everybody can be trained to think and to act in a different way. Our mindset is not fixed, it can be expanded at any time.

The situation we are facing now is a great opportunity to challenge our current mindset and evolve it into a new mindset that serves us better. We can train in everything and move forward one step at a time. Fear is just an emotion and it can help us grow into a better person. Approaching life this way is a sign of a growth mindset.

“Every single day you get past a bit of your fear, take on a bit of the unknown, you stretch into becoming who you are capable of being”

-Mary Morrissey

New beliefs can’t be forced upon you, they require a daily practice, like any art or sport you eventually want to master. But you can start as of today to change them and replace them.

(to be continued...)

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